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[Fail] One More Week of This

4 months ago

425 words

Photo: Our new CSA has a blackberry bramble where we get to pick our own blackberries. They are absolutely without a doubt the most delicious things you’ve ever eaten. What a very pleasant surprise and absolute joy to walk the row with my two little boys and they stuff themselves on the things. The berries are tart and sweet and amazing. The brambles are fun and full of bugs and birds and thorns.  It’s such an adventure moving from the start of the row to the end, walking a straight line and yet seeing so much, doing so much, and laughing all along the way. CSAs are not cheap, and they are certainly a lifestyle choice… but Lord, I’m so grateful. It’s the best of my summer.

 

I have just transcribed 14 pages of a handwritten scene from my journal into my computer. Yes, I was editing as I went. No, it’s still not good enough for submission. Yes, it’s due before midnight tonight. My last assignment is due next Tuesday and that’s relatively much easier than the work I’m doing right now. I’m very sorry to follow up Monday’s serious post with this Fail Post, but I simply don’t have the bandwidth to dedicate my full brain to this post and submit writing to my coach that I’m proud of.

I will say, though, that I am so very grateful to you Dear Readers for your comments, messages and emails. I almost didn’t write Monday’s post because this isn’t a story about me and, in some ways, it isn’t my story to tell. In the face of the much larger narrative of a violent and bias nation and the equally large, yet significantly more intimate, narrative of a mother and brother left behind and grieving, my own personal heartache is nothing. Absolutely nothing. My feelings, my thoughts, my musings… they absolutely do not matter in the face of all that Christopher’s family is going through. I simply wanted the words to be written: Christopher was a good man. His life mattered. It was more valuable and precious than some cop took it upon himself to quantify.

Anyway, my apologies again for this little Fail post. Forgive me as I try my best not to be overwhelmed by summer. Someone remind me next year to not sign up for classes during the summer time! Not a good idea, ya’ll! Just send me a tweet or something! “Wait until September! You’ll have time for it in September!”

Lordy.

I will see you Friday for Quiet Thoughts.

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