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2 years ago

1061 words

Photo: You make them and you tell yourself that they are their own person. Or you decide that they are your spouse’s child. But then they give you a look or let fly a phrase and you realize just how much of yourself you’ve passed down. This picture might as well be of me. I totally invented that look.

 

This is the conversation that just happened in my bedroom.

Major: “I’m so excited that the PJs are in the dresser now. It’s so nice.”

Me: “I know, right? And there is so much more room now, and it’s nice and neat in the closet…”

Major: “And it’s nice that we get to choose our clothes now. Ahhh… it’s so nice and different.”

There is a pause while Major looks around my room in the way that a child does: boldly, yet understanding that he’s in restricted territory. He puts his hands on his stomach, drums for a second,  then nods his head in assessment. “But this room,” he starts, “is a little crappy. There are… there are pants on the floor, and shoes over there… and is that a baby toy over there? Yeah… what the heck?”

I…

wanted to laugh so badly. I wanted to grab my belly and double over laughing loudly and for a long time.

But I didn’t, because that would not be appropriate.

Snatching him up wouldn’t be either. I just nodded and looked around. “Yeah, I guess mommy’s room is always the last one to get clean. Cleaning up after you two fools usually takes up all of my day…” then I shooed him to the bathroom because get out, you!

There are a handful of friends who know me and have known me for a while who read this blog. They are probably laughing because they know exactly where Major got that from. That was, seriously, me. All me. Raw and unfiltered 100% me. What used to come out all the time when I was younger, now generally confined to the inward spaces of my mind. Yes, I’ve been known to walk into spaces and be like, “this place right here is just… what the heck.” I’ve written many times that I still not terribly diplomatic when it comes to my facial expressions. What can I say? I’m not perfect.

I was very fortunate to be surrounded by people who love me and didn’t smack me every time I let my judgmentalness out, so… I let my four year-old slide this one time.

We are working on the “what the heck” thing, though. I don’t know where he picked it up and I’m desperately trying to stop it. Seriously! I don’t know where he got it from! When I want to curse, I just curse. I rarely say “heck,” so I don’t know where he got it from. I’m suspecting it’s from someone at school… but it wasn’t me. Seriously! You gotta believe me!

I’m also trying to peel back some of the potty talk, too. Major’s second-favorite phrase is “you’re a poo-poo butt” or “that’s just poo-poo.” *sigh* You are killing me, kid.

And you know who is parroting it too, right? Minor, of course!

Major: “I don’t know what the heck that is all about.”

Me: “[Major]! Stop with the ‘what the heck!'”

Minor: “What the heck!?” [fit of giggles because defiance is hilarious]<– trait also 100% me.

This is, of course, after a morning when both boys fought me during every step of our morning routine. Every single step. Didn’t want to get up, didn’t want to get on the potty, wanted to play instead of eat, wanted to eat instead of get dressed, wanted to play instead of get their coats on. When trying to put his shirt on, Minor discovered that if he flops over instead of standing straight, I can’t get his shirt past his head.

Put the shirt on the child’s head, he crumbles to the floor.

Stand him up, put the shirt on his head

he crumbles to the floor.

He crumbles to the floor and laughs.

Lordy. These children are just… much muchness. Thank God for the few hours of peace I got today.

You know what I did with it? I purchased my fabric today! Lookie, look!

20160106_131022

The grey on the left is going to be for the inside. The next color over is white, I swear. My camera skills are so poor! The texture doesn’t show terribly well, but each fabric has a bit of it. I’m looking forward to making my first block to see how everything is going to look together! This is another project for a baby, so there is a deadline and what not. I know that these colors don’t scream baby, but that’s what I was going for. There is plenty of baby stuff in this world in loud pink and blue. My favorite gifts for the boys were the ones that came in more sophisticated hues. If I have a block assembled by Friday, I’ll include a picture in my Quiet Thoughts post. Might not happen, though… I’ve gotta wash, dry, iron and cut this fabric in preparation.

I’ve also got some other things going on, including a very small freelance writing gig. Have I written about that? It’s a small, small gig, but it’s something to be excited about. My first paid thing since I left the workplace to be a mother. I’m excited and anxious, learning quite a bit as I go along. The pay is just enough to help me with little indulgences like my crafting habit. It fits perfectly where we are in life right now. Hopefully, though, if I do it well enough, it can turn into more as the boys really get rolling with school. I hope to apply some of what I learn to this space, too. We’ll see.

Maybe I’ll save some money and put it toward a real camera so I can be like the other cool mommy bloggers. No more blurry pictures in 2016?

I feel like I’d get a PS4 first…

… ok, ok, we all know it’s gonna go toward tuition or clothes for these two children…

adulting is no fun. 🙂

What are you up to, Dear Reader? Have you started a 2016 project yet? I wanna know about it!

See you Friday for Quiet Thoughts.

4 Replies to “Apples and Trees”

  1. “What the heck?!?” Is w common phrase from my five year old. No clue where that phrase came from, either!
    Such a serious look on your little boy’s face! Adorable!

  2. Yoga. If you don’t hear from me Im somewhere stuck in sideways pigeon pose. You can prolly find me though if you follow the “What the Fucks?!” Bring a prybar.

    Your camera skills are fine. Spend $15 on a table top tripod that flexes and can be snapped onto the edge of tables etc.

    The demons are so yours. And they have all the beauty of who you are. Well done, Team Parents.

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