Photo: My mother has three siblings and each of them got some special time with the boys while we were down. Because “Great-Aunt/Uncle” was a bit of a mouthful, the boys shortened it to “Greatest” [name] instead, which makes everybody laugh. So this is duck feeding at Culler Lake with one of their “Greatest” uncles. Took me right back to being a little girl doing the same thing in the summer time. Frederick is such a wonderful place.
The farmhouse is still in one piece. Laundry has been done (but not put away). My eldest was able to survive the 8 hour trip with only two bathroom breaks (a miracle) but then once he got home, decided to use the potty without taking off his underroos. So… Mama had a huge mess to clean up within the first five minutes of getting in the door.
but I’m not bitter.
Anyway, we’ve returned. And it’s great. Because it’s not too hot, and I don’t feel obligated to visit and as soon as these two little bears go to bed, I’m going to get clean and then I’m going to bed! Back to normal, ya’ll. Tomorrow, we’re back to normal. I swear, I’m going to make tofu every day for a month. We’ve eaten entirely too much junk for a week. Gotta get back on all the wagons, you dig?
I couldn’t have more appreciation for our little house after our time down south. I spent a lot of time with people who love me, each of spending a lot of energy trying to convince me to come down here.
“The neighborhoods are so diverse, it’s like every little pack of kids that walk by the window have a person of every shade!”
“And you know, Kyra, the school system just gave all the teachers a big raise. They are really working hard on creating a high-caliber school system.”
“Did someone mention that [such and such company] is building a brand new crazy huge office here in town? Gonna bring 3,000 high-tech jobs to the city! I’m sure [The Husband] can find something in his field!”
“What do you think of the houses here? I know you worked hard for that home in Massachusetts, and you’ll love some things, but think of all that you’ll gain…”
Believe me, that’s just a tiny portion of it. The pitch lasted the entire week we were there!
O to escape the Siren’s call… to experience silence instead of steady drumbeat and sumptuous music. You can can shake your head, tie yourself to the mast but, Lord, the music… it’s still beautiful.
But it ain’t all perfect down there. Traffic was awful. Mom lives in a neighborhood where you can stand between her house and her neighbor’s house and practically touch the both of them if you have your arms spread wide (for real. I’m exaggerating only a tiny bit here). There is a lot of noise on the street, at all house, and because all of the communities are new builds, all the trees are small and not able to give much shade. I mean, yes, sidewalks. Ok, nice design. Was that a swimming pool that we could walk to? Oh, lovely!
But… it wasn’t appealing. Not spectacularly. There was a lot about it that made The Husband and I want to stay away.
Longtime readers are throwing up their hands. “You’re such a Millennial, Kyra!” You are screaming at your screen. “You want everything all the time! What’s wrong with you? All you ever write about is how much you want to go home!”
This is true. Your frustration is valid.
I do, indeed, want to go home.
Yeah, I’m being a brat. There is no other way to put it.
I love my house. I love my birdsong. I love my quiet. I love my big green trees and clover-covered yard. I love my foxes. I love my charming, old, amazing and quirky little farmhouse. If only I could pick it up and take it with me.
“You’ll find another house to fall in love with. Think of your boys. Think of what they need. They need their family. They need diverse classmates. They need a more balanced way to see the world.”
“Yeah, but then I’d have to change the name of my blog.”
Ok, I didn’t say that part. That would be dumb.
But Lord if they didn’t lay it on thick, yeah? What do they want me to do? Push my husband out of his perfectly good job where he’s incredibly happy? In this economy? Are they high?
It’s not that there isn’t a single house in the entire state of Maryland that will appeal to me. Certainly there is. But I think I went down there for the first time not looking for an in. I didn’t want it so badly that I would have salivated at the first open house, you know? We’ve got an established standard for our wants and needs and if we are going to jump, we need to jump for right and practical reasons, not just because we want to or because we miss our old geography.
The Siren’s song is sweet and perfect, there are rocks between you and whatever she’s offering.
The discussion I had with my husband on the way back up here circled around circumstances. What would it take for us to go home? When would be the best window to do so? When would be less ideal for moving? Is there a “point of no return” for us? We’ve thought about these questions before, when Major was first born and even the thought of enrolling him in school felt like a long way away. We don’t want to be surprised and pushed into action again… then again, preemptively jumping just because we’ve caught a glimpse of a different kind of life isn’t necessarily wise. We are where we are, we’ve worked really hard to get here and to stay here. Next month marks 9 years for us in this state (!!!). We’ve been homesick from day one. Time to exercise some self control.
The problem with Sirens, though, is that they don’t stop singing.
In the meantime, I am here and I need to write oh my God I’m so far behind why did I do this to myself help me Lord help me
Sorry. Lost myself for a second.
Yeah, I’m feeling a bit behind. I’ll be up with the sun tomorrow to catch up. Goals are still goals, even when you go on vacation.
I learned a little bit about setting up the grandparents for success. Lots of Quiet Thoughts for your upcoming Friday.
Until then, take care.