Hrm… I Feel Like I Should Re-Read One of Them Thar Aesop’s Fables…

Photo: Did I say that I wasn’t going to do any fabric art this month? I said that… didn’t I? But, well… you see, my hands get cold when I type, so I needed this! I needed it, I say!


I didn’t write on Saturday.

And I didn’t write until late on Sunday.

And then I got up this morning to write.

But it’s like, too late, because I am totally screwed.

And it’s all because I made multiple miscalculations this weekend. The primary of which was the following: “Girl, you hit 30,000 words on Friday! You are way ahead of the game. Take you a day off. You deserve it!”

So when I woke up on Saturday a little brain-numb from all of the stuff I’ve been doing, I was like, “You know, I’m going to take that advice!”

And I did wake up a little brain numb on Saturday. I’m fighting too many battles with the boys and it is… oh my God… it’s so exhausting.

Ursa Major is the worst phase he’s ever been in. It’s the perfect storm, too, of his brilliance and his youth. It’s a combination of the “why” phase and also the “I don’t have to do what you say the first time you say it” phase. I find myself having to tell the child what to do upwards of 5 times in order for him to comply and when he finally starts to do it, the first thing he comes out with is a “why?” Which just raises my blood pressure. The other part of the “Why” thing, though I love his curiosity, is that he has no control over it. “Why is that car red?” “But why did you tell me to stop running?” “Mommy, why is it peanut butter?” Really, kid, you’re killing me. I feel like I’m always growling at the child and I don’t mean to… but it gets grating within 20 minutes of his being awake and active. I think that the worst thing about this is the knowledge that the “why” phase is only starting and it’s only going to get worse before it’s going to get better. Major does do a lot of follow-up “whys” yet. Usually you only have to go one-level down before he is satisfied. Sometimes it is fun to explain until you are out of explanation (we had a pretty fun conversation about steam today. Had to recall some stuff from high school Matter & Energy class), but other times it’s just asinine (“Mommy, why is Dora laughing at that tree?”). And, of course, after a full day of it… it’s just… augh. I love the boy, I really do…

And then his brother… oh, his brother! His brother is having a hard time with transitions. He seems like a sweetie, until it is time to do the next thing. Doesn’t matter how much warning you give him, he deteriorates into a ball of noise. Not quite loud enough to be a straight up scream, not quite low enough to just be a whine, not a single comprehensible word of English to express needs… So you do your best to fix whatever the problem is, and you probably find the solution about fifty percent of the time. The other fifty percent you are waiting him out until he is finally distracted by something. Last Friday, that child got himself so worked up about leaving a playdate that it took him the better of 30 minutes to calm down and get it together… Lord give me strength…

And that’s on top of the continued Potty War. I believe that when history looks back on the Great Potty War of 2014, I’ll be on the losing side. Just embarrassed and pitiful. Weeping in a corner, fading into obscurity. Think of just about any losing general in a great war and that’s me. Just… loserific. We might try to make Thanksgiving weekend a cold-turkey weekend (pun totally intended). We’ll see.

So anyway, yes. Brain numb.

So I decided to knit and binge-watch House of Cards instead (and clean the house and do some other duties… but low key stuff). I found this adorable little pattern for cable-stitch wrist warmers (fingerless gloves, essentially, but even without holes to put your fingers through). I finished the first one last night and… found it to be majorly wanting. I mean, it’s pretty, yes. It’s warm, yes. It fits around my wrist and hand, yes… but… I at least want a place to put my thumb. And I kinda want it to wrap up over my fingers (but still give my fingers free range so that I can knit or type while wearing them) because they get cold while I’m writing and knitting, too!

Sooooo… I had to scour some of my pattern books to find what I was looking for…

I am capable of a lot of things. Probably can do anything if I set my mind to it... but I'm pretty sure I'll never be a hand model. Just... just don't think that one is in the cards for me.
I am capable of a lot of things. Probably can do anything if I set my mind to it… but I’m pretty sure I’ll never be a hand model. Just… just don’t think that one is in the cards for me. Seriously, though, what am I supposed to do with my thumb over here? My thumb can’t be warm and functional?

Annnnd now I think I’m going to have to design my own pattern to get exactly what I want. I’m pretty sure I can do that… Which is hilarious because: 1) I’ve been knitting for only about a year, right? and 2) It’s NaNo and I’m behind on my work so why does my brain suddenly want to design a knitting pattern??  What the hell is wrong with me??

Punishment from the Writing Gods came down two-fold. The first was, (surprise!) The Husband decided we would go to church on Sunday, even though I’d been walking around thinking I wouldn’t. So boom, two hours erased from the universe (though this time the sermon was good and so was the lesson and I think I might have walked away with ideas for another story–my brain… seriously). Punishment number two came late afternoon. When I started sneezing… and sniffling…

That’s right. The boys brought pestilence into the house and that pestilence got through the mommy defenses.


So I’ve been blowing my nose all day. I was overdue for the sniffles, to be sure! I got away pretty unscathed from some of the nastier things that came through here over the summer and fall, but still…  Mama’s don’t get sick days. Especially Mamas on a deadline!

What is the moral of the story, dear reader? Don’t take a day off. Not even when you are brain numb. Not even when you just feel like knitting. House of Cards, glorious as it is, it’s just not–

I can’t type it.

It was totally worth it. 🙂 2 more episodes to go before I’m caught up!

It’s a nasty gross cold awful terrible day in Massachusetts today. Just awful. And yes, I had to run all of my errands in it because, again, Writing Gods aren’t pleased with me. But you know what? My Google playlist was in the mood to play The Killers straight out the gate when we got in the car. If a crazy Black woman and two toddlers went speeding by you rocking out to All These Things That I Have Done this morning, well, that was us. And it was awesome. Best way to know that it’s going to be a good week. And it will be. There are no other choices!

See you Wednesday! Hopefully with some damn sunshine!



5 Comments Add yours

  1. I love your writing AND your knitting! (And I’m not sure who exactly gets to work as a hand model – wouldn’t you feel pretty weird saying that was your job, anyway?)

    1. K.C. Wise says:

      Awww! Thank you! I appreciate that!! Especially about the knitting–I’m very much a novice, still!

      I’ve always looked at those women on the Price is Right and shows like it and I’m like, “How do you train for that?” Their pretty little hand movements over the can of beans, the way they sweep their arms over the mustang convertible… I mean, that make it LOOK easy, I know, but it can’t possibly BE easy. Right? Anyway, being a hand model would mean never washing another dish or scrubbing another bath tub and, well, that’s pretty much an impossibility in my life, soooooooo I guess I’ll never get the chance. Oh well! It might be fun to bring up at a fancy dinner party: “So, madam, what do you do?” “Well, sir, I am a hand model.” At this point things can go one of two ways. Option 1) the record rips, the entire room stops and stares and you feel like a fool OR Option 2) you are the single most interesting person in the room because everyone else is a stuffy old lawyer/banker/doctor and always have the same three things to talk about.

      Probably option 1… truth be told…

      But a girl can dream, right?

  2. Dude, what season are we on now? I’ve seen the first two. How far behind am I?! Catchupcatchupcatchup…

    Ask Major why he wants to know next time he drops a why. See if his mind smokes like a Tic Tac Toe playing Joshua in War Games.

    And what about stealing the pattern off a pair of toed socks, ya know those ones that are like gloves for your feets, and are usually day-glo striped and all funky patterns? Or hell, getcha some damn half-finger fisherman’s gloves, and swipe the pattern from those.

    Channel Steve Jobs; steal shamelessly.

    Nice job on the Na-no 😉 Here’s to a rockin’ week!

    1. K.C. Wise says:

      It’s only been 2 seasons! The third season is supposed to come out really soon! I am gonna try to finish on Saturday because I’ll have some time to myself. Oh my God… that one scene, that one time, in that one place!!! SO CRAZY!

      And that other scene, with those other people, in that other place!

      Seriously–Freddy… killin’ me. That whole storyline.

      ANYWAY. I followed your advice and found a bunch of different patterns to fit my needs. I think I’ll be be able to doctor to the point of getting the product I want! HURRAY!!!! But not til December 1st. LOOOOORRRRD I’ve gotta get to December 1st!!

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.